Nana Papa

A very Happy Birthday to you Nana Papa. As I wish you on this blog, I miss your presence in my life. I always wanted you to see how I do in life – professionally as well as personally. After all, a large part of what I am today is thanks to you.
But, I guess that was not to be. You left us all in 2004, just a few months before my post graduation convocation ceremony. I still regret not coming for the last rites. I should have……maybe I did not have the courage….. maybe I would not have been able to face it.
You have been a great influence in my life directly as well as indirectly. You were an extremely smart and sharp businessman, a great family man, a fantastic cook and a much better human being. You have always been there for people and your assessment of things, jewellery or people has been very good.
Now, when I sit back and try to think of all the things that you have taught me….. I can think of lot of things that I learnt from you and a lot more that I could have but just did not.
It was you who taught me how to play Chaupar, Seep and Ludo. It always used to be my attempt to beat you in each of these games, but you were too good at each one of them, and I hardly got a few chances to do that. But whenever, I did that, it just made me feel that I have learned something from you.
I have also seen you play Canasta a lot with your friends, but I just never got a chance to learn that from you.
While accompanying you to the vegetable markets, I learnt from you how to pick the right size peas, the best quality tomatoes and capsicums and others, and how to negotiate prices with people. There were times, when I did not like to go to the vegetable market, but now when I think of it, without realizing, it was all a part of my learning, which helps me even today.
It was you who made me develop interest in jewellery and gem stones. The way you used to look at them and figure out what is good and what is not, made me curious to know of what lies behind these stones. To understand them better, I used to come and sit at the shop and you would tell me all the details about each stone. The more I learnt the more intrigued I used to get. At one point of time in my life, I was thinking of entering this business, but things changed over the years and I ended up in the corporate world, though my love for gem stones still remains.
It was amazing to see you play the Harmonium with such finesse. You could take out the tune of any song within minutes, and I would admire your ability to play with both your hands. Though I tried to learn a bit of it from you, I could not perfect the art. Rupal gifted me a keyboard last year on my birthday, and I practice on that these days. Hopefully, I should be able to improve in times to come, though I am able to play only with one hand. But, I am learning so that I can take this talent of yours forward.

Pav Bhaji was my favourite dish for years because of you. I have never tasted Pav Bhaji better than what you used to make. It used to be a great Sunday, when you would be in the kitchen, pounding on the vegetables and putting the masala to make the perfect bhaji. I used to look forward to those Sundays.
You loved to take care of everyone in the house and quality was never compromised on. You used to get the best of fruits, vegetables, mithai and other things in the house. I remember how happy you used to feel on getting Pink Rasgulle from Annapurna or Karachi Halwa for Goldy and me, and we used to relish it so much.
All of us were also pampered on certain Sundays with Bedmi Aaloo or Nagauri Halwa, which you used to go and get personally. You gave so much colour and characteristic to Chandni Chowk for me, that it is difficult to put it down in words like this.
I even remember the evening walks that we used to have on the terrace alongwith Mom and Nanima, and how in summers, we would throw water on the terrace floor to make the house cooler. We would also take bath in chilling cold water in the hot and humid summers of Delhi and it would be very refreshing.
Memories are coming alive in front of me, as I am putting words here. Right now, my mind takes me back to our trip to Kullu Manali and how the hot cup of tea became the best thing in the world on the chilly Rohtang Pass.
It was amazing to hear stories and incidents of your life from you as well as others. I remember about your kidnapping and how you managed your stay with the dacoits, your experience of leaving Multan, your visits to different countries across the world, your deal of the emerald glasses, your trips to Orissa and many more.
You played the biggest role in ensuring my MBA happens without any problems. You were my biggest support and you always felt that I would do well in life. It was your faith in me that drove me to do the things that I continue to do in life.
This is just a very small attempt on my part to put down the things that you have done for me. There are too many more things that you have done, but it will just not be possible to put everything down.
I so wish that you were there in some of the big moments of my life – my post graduation, my first job, my first salary, my marriage. I know Nana Papa, that although you were not there physically, you were still always there, watching me from above and guiding me, whenever I have needed it.
I miss you a lot……. I hope to live upto your dreams and make you proud.
Thank you once again for everything.

Familiarity in Unfamiliar Places

Offices, societies, apartment complexes, colleges. There are always faces that you see daily at these places, whom you never talk to. They are not your friends, colleagues, neighbours or a part of your gang so there is no interaction. They know about your existence and you know about theirs, but there is no interaction.

Life keeps going on and on, where you keep seeing them and they keep seeing you and that’s about it.

Suddenly, when you are out of your regular place, where you see that person daily, and you are at an unfamiliar place and you happen to see or bump into that same person, a smile comes on to your face and the same happens to the other person. Both acknowledge each other’s presence and sometimes even talk.

It is surprising to note that for days/months/years, one has been seeing the same person at the same place, but one does not talk, smile or interact with the other person, but when the same person is seen or met at a new or unfamiliar place, things change.

I just experienced something similar yesterday. I had gone to my regular supermarket for some household purchases, and the parking attendant happened to be a guy, who used to work as a security guard in my housing complex. On seeing me, he smiled and I also smiled. My immediate reaction was to ask him whether he has changed jobs that he is there and his reply was that this was just a weekend duty, which he was doing. This is the same guy, who is there on many days, when I bring my car back to my house, and he opens the gate for me and I park my car in my parking area. There had been no interaction with him before this, and yet when we met, we smiled and spoke to each other. After speaking to him, this thought of familiarity in unfamiliar places was playing in my mind continuously.

What is it at new or unfamiliar places that change our reaction on seeing a familiar place? Is it that we feel assured to see someone we know? Is it basic courtesy (which I am not sure, as then in that case, where was all the courtesy all this while?)

I do not have the answer and I think that is something researchers and behaviour analysts need to monitor and figure out.