TRUST – It Comes and Goes at Unknown Places

The thought of this blog came after a few messages that got exchanged between a friend and me on Twitter. It made me thinking and I thought that the word/feeling/emotion called ‘TRUST’ needs a more detailed probing and thinking, and rightly so, as this small but powerful word plays a critical and crucial role in relationships, businesses, partnerships, negotiations, and any other human transaction one can think of.

For the purview of this blog, I would like to keep relationships out of this deep dwelling as presence of trust in that is a given and is a mandatory. It would be interesting to explore the dimensions of Trust and how it acts up in non-personal situations.

Let me start with an incident that happened a few days back and which further strengthened the idea of putting this blog: I had gone to the petrol pump to get fuel filled in my car and the attendant asked me to check the zero sign before he started filling the tank. Since I could not see the digits while sitting in the car, I got off the car to check the zero. What struck me there and then is that trust is the first thing that goes out of the window as soon as you enter a petrol pump. You will perpetually go and check the zero sign every single time even though it may be the petrol pump where you go regularly to get fuel filled.

This made me sit up and start thinking about places where trust is at the lowest level and then there are also places where trust is the highest. Let us talk of another example where trust is high.

Ever tried opening a new email account or signing up for a new account online. Chances are that as part of the registration process, you are asked to accept the terms and conditions which run into a few pages. No one and I repeat no one ever bothers to go through the fine print and immediately presses the ‘Accept’ button.  This happens despite the person on the other side being a stranger and an unknown face and the risk being higher that what you are accepting may not exactly be what you agree with. So how is it that trust in such a situation tends to go up significantly? Is it lack of time, the hurry to get the registration done with or difficulty in understanding the legal language? If you sit back and ask yourself, the answer is none of these and it is our inherent trust that stems from the fact that if a site is online, it has to be reputed and hence can be trusted. Not necessarily true but the reality.

No matter how good a human being and truthful a real estate agent may be, the trust that you put on him while doing a property deal is never rock solid and it is always wavering. You are always hoping that you get what you have been promised at a rate that does not make you feel that you have been fleeced or cheated. In this case, trust gets governed not by the individual but by the perceptions that have been formed.

The word SALE often used to conjure doubt in the minds of shoppers, atleast till a few years back. One would often hear comments like “This must be their rejected goods” or “They must have increased the prices first and now they are showing it as discount”. Thankfully, due to the presence of more and more organized players, such perceptions have changed for the better and people trust Sales and Discounts to be genuine nowadays.

Every time you hand over your car keys to a valet, whether in a 5 star hotel or a small restaurant or a wedding venue where valets have been hired, you are not only handing over the keys but you are also placing implicit trust in the valet with the assumption that not only will he park your car safely, but you will also get your car back the way you gave it.  

I think the above-mentioned situations should give you a drift of what I am trying to say. I am sure there would be many more such incidents in each one’s life where trust tends to go up or down depending on our experiences, our perceptions and our own approach to life.

Are you the fourth in line?

Imagine this situation happening on the road in Bengaluru: 

Girl on road at Koramangala: Will you go to Old Airport Road?

Auto 1: Yes, but I will charge Rs. 90/-

Girl: But the fare till that place is only Rs. 50/-

Auto 1: Your call. I will charge Rs. 90/-

Girl lets go of the auto and stops the next one.

Auto 2: I will charge Rs. 90/-

Girl tries to haggle but with no result, she lets go of the auto and stops the next one.

Auto 3: I will charge Rs. 90/-

Girl tries to haggle but with no result, she lets go of the auto and stops the next one.

Auto 4: I will charge Rs. 90/-

Without any discussion, girl sits in the auto and ends up paying Rs. 90/-

Now you can imagine the situation by assuming any city that you want/where you live. Instead of the girl, you can imagine yourself. And instead of the auto, you can imagine a cab, a street vendor or any other person you can think of.

Chances are that you would have also experienced a similar situation and by the time you reached the fourth guy, you would be so tired and frustrated that you would just give in and end up paying the same amount that the first guy was asking for.

Now sit back and reflect at this situation and you will see a few insightful things emerging out from this:

1) There was no fault of the first guy to ask what he asked for (ignore the overcharging part). He was simply unlucky to be the first in line but he set the context for the amount that you would pay.

2) You obviously knew that you are paying the fourth guy the same amount of money that the first guy was asking for but you are frustrated enough now to go back to the first guy nor is there any need for you to do so.

3) The fourth guy probably does not know that he is the fourth guy that you are encountering and that you have already crossed the limit of your patience and your negotiation skills. Had he known that, he would have probably quoted Rs. 100 instead of Rs. 90 and chances are that you would have even agreed to pay that much. So that is an opportunity loss for him due to lack of information (Though he is still earning/charging more than what he should).

4)  Had you known that you would still end up paying the same amount of money that the first guy was asking for, chances are that you would not have wasted so much time and energy and negotiating and waiting for a better/reasonable deal.

5) If you had the energy and time to negotiate one more time, who knows, the auto guy would have reduced the price by Rs. 10 or 20

So what emerges from the points mentioned above is a classic case of economics where other than two critical factors – demand and supply, there are two more dimensions that come into play. These two dimensions are: Time and Energy

Often we tend to ignore these two critical dimensions when it comes to striking a deal – small or big, but they play a critical role in the sub-conscious minds of ours.

It is not the question of an auto guy or a question of Rs. 50 vs. Rs. 90. These two dimensions play an important role across all deals and the best negotiators will tell you this that one of the tricks to get the deal in your favour is to stall it till the end, knowing fully well that the other party will give in when either he is short on time or short on energy.

So if you are the auto guy (to be read as the guy wanting to strike the deal), try and be the fourth in line and chances of getting a good price and the deal will increase significantly. If you are the victim (to be read as the guy who has already negotiated earlier and is in a hurry to close the deal now), then either try and increase the energy and time you have to negotiate the deal or just close the deal with the first guy and move on as it will give you lesser heart burn.

Ranbir Kapoor – The True Rockstar!

Everything that I had blogged earlier remains the same. The only difference is that one can add Barfi to his list  of performances, where he delivers.

This is what I had blogged when Rockstar had released...

5.00 pm on a Sunday outside a multiplex in Delhi and I see the board of Housefull. I am there to buy tickets for the 6.30 pm show but I am told that the 6.30 pm show is also Housefull and hence I end up buying tickets for the late night show for Rockstar.

While heading back home, I was thinking about the career of Ranbir Kapoor so far in the Hindi film industry and following films and their fate come to my mind in the same order:

1.   Debut film: Saawariya: Super Flop
2.   Raajneeti : Super Hit
3.   Bachna Ae Haseeno: Average
4.   Wake up Sid: Hit
5.    Rocket Singh – Salesman of the Year: More than Average
6.    Anjaana Anjaani: Average
7.    Ajab Prem ki Gajab Kahaani: Hit

I could not recollect any other movies of Ranbir, though I feel that there are 2 – 3 more films in which he has appeared.

What was also surprising me was that I had seen all of the above movies of his (yeah yeah including Saawariya but thankfully at home and on a DVD!) I had done this without any plan of watching each and every movie of his and had never even thought about it till yesterday and there I was, once again buying tickets for another one of his movies.

I gave this a little more thought. This guy has not delivered a hit after hit. This guy does not have the biceps like Salman Khan or the intellect of Aamir Khan or the wits of Shah Rukh Khan. When I saw Ranbir on screen for the first time, I did not rate his looks too highly and I had my doubts about his stay in the industry.  In fact, this guy gave us one of the most boring movies and a super duper flop in the form of Saawariya, which could have meant doom for him and a complete good-bye to his career but yet there are people like me who have come to see one more of his film.

I tried to analyze a bit more about this phenomenon called Ranbir Kapoor. Here is a guy who is not on any of the social networking sites the way other celebs are. He does not come and talk about his movie on each and every channel nor does he kill with a marketing overdose. This is a guy who likes to do limited work and let his work do the talking. He does endorsements where also he plays different roles.

Coming from the illustrious Kapoor family, Ranbir has got things easier, without any struggle. As lot of people would like to say, he was born with a silver spoon and that would make lot of people jealous of him and his achievements. But I must admit that I have never ever read jokes or pot shots directed at Ranbir (other than his romantic life) on any of the social medium the way people rip apart Abhishek Bachchan or Udit Chopra or even Shah Rukh Khan.

What has worked for Ranbir is the kind of roles that he has played and the realism that he has brought to those characters. The role that Ranbir played in Wake Up Sid allowed lot of youngsters to relate to him. Similarly, his role in Rocket Singh as a Surd was as realistic as it could get. The role of a shrewd politician with shades of grey in Raajneet further showed his caliber and versatility and also made people compare him to Rahul Gandhi.

With the aim of digging deeper into the success of Ranbir Kapoor, I left my thoughts at that point and headed to watch Rockstar. Once again Ranbir proves his mettle in the movie and does complete justice to his role of Janardhan Jhakar aka Jordan. Ranbir has got powerful and emotive eyes which allow him to straddle from the role of an innocent boy to a romantic lover to an angry man to a drunkard to a spaced out rockstar in a span of a single film. It would not be wrong to say that the entire movie is carried on the shoulders of Ranbir Kapoor and whatever success the film garners would be due to the performance that Ranbir gives in the film.

Ranbir Kapoor actually has the versatility of Raj Kapoor, the spunk of Shammi Kapoor, the charm of Rishi Kapoor and the eyes of Neetu Kapoor. With all of this, he has amazing confidence and absolutely no inhibitions of letting go completely towards his passion. All of this makes him a complete Rockstar and I think now Ranbir has made a permanent mark in the film industry with a stamp that says ‘Jeena Yahaan, Marna Yaahan, Iske Siva Jaana Kahaan’.

DIWALI – A FESTIVAL OF…

Diwali is the biggest festival in India, celebrated by millions across the nation with great pomp and fervour. It is a festival that is awaited every year with lot of excitement.

While the general feeling is that Diwali is a festival of lights, which it surely is, one needs to analyze this a bit deeper to really put down meaning on what Diwali means for different people. Basis my observations of Diwali over the years, I am attempting to broaden the scope and definition of Diwali. Diwali is a:

• Festival of glimmer and hope for all the candle-makers and diya makers who try to earn a large amount of their annual income through their sales in the few days prior to Diwali.
• Festival of coming back home and enjoying home food for all those students who are studying in another land away from their homes.
• Festival of a holiday abroad for the families who head out of the country every year on Diwali as this is the time when the parents and the kids, both have a long enough leave to enjoy a good holiday.
• Festival of opportunity for all the trading communities, consumer durable companies, gifting companies as a large part of their revenues get generated during the 15 days preceding Diwali.
• Festival of socializing for all the la-di-dah ladies who attend various high profile Diwali parties across their friends.
• Festival of Glee for all the Teen Patti and Poker enthusiasts who emerge from various locations with Gaddis in their pockets and the illusion and belief in their head that it will be their day today and they would make a big kill.
• Festival of new beginnings for all the business and trading houses who start their new books of accounts on the day of Diwali.
• Festival of Welcome as the doors of every house is open to welcome Goddess Lakshmi as well as the guests who come to greet and meet them.
• Festival of splurging as saving money as a concept goes out of the window for these few days as it is the time of indulging yourself in new clothes, new products, new mobiles or anything else that you can splurge on.
• Festival of bingeing and weight gain as every house is filled with sweets and chocolates and it definitely goes and sits in someone’s tummy.
• Festival of Desire as everyone who sees people better off (whether in terms of the car that they drive, the clothes that they wear, the parties that they attend, the gifts that they buy) desires to such a lifestyle.

Last but definitely not the least, Diwali is a Festival of Money. It is a festival where money changes hands every minute and every second, where money comes to a few and goes from a few, where money defines the feeling and the mood of the people, where money decides whether it is really a prosperous Diwali or not.     

On that note, wishing all you readers a very Happy and Prosperous Diwali and a great year ahead! 

STEVE JOBS - RIP

It is a very awkward feeling when you wake up to the news of the death of a person you admire. You want to tell yourself that this doesn’t seem to be true. You switch channels to confirm the veracity of the news. Today morning, something similar happened to me when I heard the news channels flashing the message ‘Steve Jobs dies’. I immediately tuned in to some of the international channels to see what people are saying across the world on such shocking news.

I discovered more about him than what I knew. Steve Jobs had 332 patents to his name so while we may know about only 10 - 12 of these, he had worked on a number of other ideas. Even the stair case design in the Apple headquarters was designed by Steve Jobs and he had a patent on that design. That was the genius that Steve Jobs was.

The first product of Steve Jobs that I experienced was the Ipod. This was years back but it made me marvel at the style and design of the product. It just changed the way we heard our music – no buttons, no CDs, cool earphones. I read about the man behind this product and discovered a lot about Steve Jobs. He had founded Apple along with Steve Wozniak. The Apple ads of 1984 clearly belong in the cult category. Steve was asked to leave the company that he had founded after a few years but that did not stop him in doing some amazing work with Pixar and no one could miss out on his caliber and hence Apple got him back to take charge.

With the launch of the iPhone, Steve Jobs changed the game and gave consumers an experience that they had not experienced before. No other company can claim to have a product for which people stay up through the night across the world to see the launch and then line up outside stores to be the first ones to get their hands on that product. When one thought that this is the best that is possible, Steve would surprise everyone by coming out with the next level of the iPhone and during his reign, Apple gave us iPhone 1, 2 , 3 and 4.

As if all of this was not enough, Steve Jobs amazed the world with the launch of iPad that made everyone sit and notice and a tablet revolution was born. Another product that caught my attention due to its sleek design and style and I also became one of the iPad owners.

Steve Jobs had said once ‘It is not the job of the consumer to know what he wants’ – a statement that would have been poo poohed by regular marketers but Steve was different and he proved his statement by giving products that consumers would never be able to ask for.

Some of his other famous quotes were:

• ‘Stay hungry, stay foolish’
• "Being the richest man in the cemetery doesn’t matter to me … Going to bed at night saying we’ve done something wonderful… that’s what matters to me.”
• “We made the buttons on the screen look so good you’ll want to lick them.”

The greatness of Steve Jobs comes across even when even rivals talk great things about him. Bill Gates tweeted– ‘Steve Jobs was a brilliant person and it was an insanely great honour to work with him’. Google has a link on their home page for Steve Jobs that takes you directly to the website of Apple, whose home page is a dedication to Steve Jobs.

While the online world is abuzz with tributes to Steve Jobs, I really thought that these two statements sum up the mood of all:

• ‘Steve Jobs logged into the world in 1955 and logged out in 2011 but human kind will never be able to delete him’
• ‘Some great people are remembered for a decade. A person like Steve Jobs will be remembered for centuries to come’ –  Rajiv Makhni

Steve Jobs was a man who was far away from thousands of us, a man we had never met personally but had heard and read so much about him that we always felt that we knew him personally as he understood what all of us wanted, he knew what it was to come out with a product that would make lives cool for people across the world.

Once again, I would like to thank Steve Jobs on behalf of each and every one who has been touched by his genius and I hope that your soul rests in peace as you have done outstanding work in this world, which lot of people will look upto and get inspired. 

RIP Steve

PROVOCATION

Tigers are known to pounce on their prey in such a way that the prey does not have any chance of escaping their claws. It is pretty understandable for them to do that as it is their way of surviving and getting their food.

The problem starts when similar behavior starts getting displayed by human beings. In their case, the one pouncing is also a person and the one being pounced is also another person. Now when cannibals do something like this, it is perfectly justified as this hunt will give them their food but when non-cannibalistic people get into this act of pouncing, it is a little difficult to fathom.

So what is it that makes people behave in this manner? What is the trigger point to this? The simple answer to this is ‘Provocation’. When people get provoked, they tend to get aggressive and irritated and the only way for them to retaliate is by hitting back at the other person.

Provocation as a tool has been used by market researchers for years in getting ideas and making people reach a level where they have to think of new solutions or options. I have personally used provocation techniques in idea workshops for new product ideas and have got tremendous results.

I completely understand the positive aspect of provocation as illustrated in the paragraph above but in most positive cases, the provocative attack involves the person himself in some way or the other directly. Anything said or mentioned is impacting that person and for them to react in such situations is as expected in normal human behavior.

In recent times, I am witnessing a new form of provocation where people get provoked even with statements or things that have got nothing to do with them directly but yet they lash out or rather become quasi spokesperson for the person or issue that is being hit at.

I can cite a number of examples from the online world:

1. When Narayana Murthy criticized the quality of students at IIT, Chetan Bhagat got provoked and tweeted a few bad things about Infosys. In return, present and ex Infoscions got provoked and hit back.

       2. When a girl wrote an open letter to a Delhi boy on her own private blog site, a huge number of people(men and women) got offended and provoked and wrote a response to that letter, logged onto the girl’s site and gave harsh comments and left abuses. Once again, if you were to sit back and notice, you will see that it was one girl’s angst after having gone through some bad experiences (probably), which she wrote on her own blog site. But people who wrote back also commented about the South Indian community at large and extolled the virtues of North Indians, thereby showing how provocation works.

People who understand human behavior and how it reacts to provocation use it for their own benefit:

•  Sidin Vadukut, a writer for MINT and a popular author understands this concept of provocation nicely and he purposely tweets statements that will provoke people and elicit a response from them. Some recent tweets of his go like this ‘Sholay is a boring movie’, ‘Paneer is for losers’, etc., which he is tweeting purposely and he mentions also that controversies sell books so I might as well create some by tweeting such things.
• Shoaib Akhtar came up with few extremely controversial statements on Sachin Tendulkar and Rahul Dravid when he launched his book ‘Controversially Yours’. In his case, the provocation was so high that it bothered the entire country  and may have not got him sales of his books but got him enough buzz and publicity.

With the convergence of the digital world, where everyone is connected to each other and people are out with knives, any provocative statement is bound to get huge reactions from people and sometimes it is intended to be that ways and sometimes it just leaves a bad taste in the mouth.

I hope this article does not provoke anyone of you because that is definitely not the intention. 

Travel Light - Happy Journey

This is an article that I had written for my B-school (MICA) magazine ‘Black Coffee’ in the year 2002 and I just came across it once again and felt that it is relevant even today and so thought of putting it up on my blog. Though it has a Deepak Chopra kind of feel to it, I still felt like sharing it with all of you.

So, here it is…..

Most of us would like to travel light, but very few of us are able to minimise our baggage. So many times, we literally sit atop overstuffed suitcases in order to snap them shut, but we are not ready to admit that we don’t really need all of those things.

Being overweight is often a problem. But we continue undeterred; consuming and accumulating fat despite our health problems. We are loath to part with the extra kilos that we lug around.

Here, I am not only talking about the visible flab but also the real flab – the weight we lug in and around our minds, the weight that drags us down.

Trimming the flab in the mind is a very daunting task that most of us don’t even attempt to do. But if we can muster the courage and make even an inept beginning – the rewards are bound to be tremendous. It may seem strange to talk about weight in the context of the human mind, but any unhappy person would know how heavy the mind can become.

Picture the mind as a room with many windows through which thoughts constantly fly in and out. The room is full of light and air. But in the middle of the room, a shape is growing. Call it the ‘I-ME-MINE’ syndrome or simple the EGO. This shape traps thoughts like flypaper traps flies. It feeds on those thoughts and grows bigger and uglier, and gradually blocks the entry of fresh air. The room becomes dark, stuffy and claustrophobic. The atmosphere also becomes heavy and stifling.

It is our own mind that bothers us but yet we keep on trying to blame the world for our affliction. We also continue to look to for world for joys, not realising that the joys are devoured by our ego.

William Blake has put it very beautifully: he who binds to himself a joy/does the winged life destroy/ but he who kisses the joy as it flies/lives in eternity’s sunrise.

Despite its size, the ego is very clever. Compel it to shed weight in one area and it puts back in the other. Ego reduction is actually a Herculean task! A good sense of humour can do a great deal to contain the ego. The ability to laugh at oneself is one of God’s greatest gifts; it can defend us from the vicissitudes of life. Most of us laugh at others, but we become very justificatory and protective when it comes to our own faults and problems.

Those who can smile through both rain and sunshine realise that the two are inseparable. Such is also the human condition, but beneath it are depths of serenity that can be reached. It is these depths that sustain us and give our lives meaning.

Another way to reduce the ego is to concentrate on the work at hand, instead of being obsessed with oneself and one’s expectations as a doer. Concentration on any activity without the interference of the ego yields unexpected pleasures. It also makes you more creative. It is the dirty tricks department of the ego that causes the major stress.

The battle for ego reduction has to be fought every day. If you can hang in there and not give up, then you will emerge as the winner. The ego will begin to shrink; fresh air will blow through the room (the mind) again. Sunshine will stream in. You will start feeling lighter and freer. The world will start looking brighter and a better place to live in.

It is a long road ahead, so the lighter you travel, the more pleasurable it will be. Hope you all are able to manage a room that is well-lit, airy and with lot of sunshine. 

DLF Emporio - luxury with a capital L

If you want to indulge yourself and luxury is what’s on your mind, then just head to DLF Emporio in New Delhi. It is a mall that defines class, luxury and prestige. It will make you want to soak in its elegance, exclusivity and aesthetics every time you visit.

Located in South Delhi’s tony Vasant Kunj area, DLF Emporio houses 74 International brandsalong with 111 Indian designer brands and other lifestyle brands under a single roof. Designed by architect Mohit Gujral in a five-star setting and conceptualised around two dramatic atrium courtyards with skylight, it has openness as its central theme.

Some of the top-end international brands that form a part of DLF Emporio are Alfred Dunhill,Bottega Veneta, Canali, Cartier, DKNY, Ermenegildo Zegna, Giorgio Armani, Gucci, Hugo Boss, Jimmy Choo, Louis Vuitton, Tods, Tom Ford, Versace, etc. These are brands that fashionistas love to flaunt and they spend considerable time and money here in a bid to make their lives more glamorous.

If you have a big Indian wedding coming up, then once again this mall is the place to head to, as you get a plethora of choices - Abu Jani & Sandeep Khosla, Abraham & Thakore, Ashima Leena, Ashish Soni, Kimaya, Malini Ramani, Manish Arora, Rina Dhaka, Rohit Bal, Satya Paul, Tarun Tahiliani. Any designer worth his or her money has a presence here. With so many options to choose from, you definitely won’t go back complaining that you did not get what you wanted.

After some retail therapy, one is bound to get hungry. Fret not, as they have taken good care of that aspect as well. They have a SET’Z – Restaurant and Bar, spread over an area of 19000 square feet featuring six world cuisines – Arabic, Japanese, Chinese, Thai, Italian and Indian.  If you are in the mood for a quick coffee or an ice-cream, then head straight to Café DLF Emporio on the Ground Floor in the lobby area and enjoy the experience of Palm trees and their lovely sink in sofas. During the Delhi winters, if you want the lovely rays of the sun from the terrace, then you should order your pastries from On the Go and enjoy the weather.

All of this put together makes this the best luxury mall that India has to offer. If you have not visited yet, make sure that it's on your agenda the next time you're out and about or visiting Delhi.

Too little and too late

Dedicating this poem to people who were innocent victims of the bomb blast that took place in Delhi on 07.09.2011


The night grew dark but there was no fear,

The heart grew heavier yet there was no tear.

He knew this was not dope,

It was a life filled with hope.

All this meandering, where will it take?

Who cares when your life is at stake.

Words and thoughts don't matter anymore,

When your goal is at fore.

One shatter to break his sleep,

No thought could be as deep.

He just sat up wide awake,

Every breath of his was equal to a quake.

Now is the time screamed his heart,

His dreams had already drifted apart.

He tried to see his soul,

But all he saw was his body taking a toll.

He finally took his last breath,

With that he embraced death.

She suddenly remembered him again,

But it was too late as he had died with pain.

Rains - Do you enjoy them or hate them?

If there is even a few days of delay in the rains hitting our streets and providing us with first smell of the wet earth from what has been predicted by the metrology department, we start panicking. A few months of the summer heat and humidity does that to us - make us desperate to get respite from the heat and rains act as our saviour. 

We look forward to that first sound of thunder, the presence of black clouds hovering in the sky, a pleasant weather, anything that gives us that glimmer of hope that we are about to get the monsoons.

But I have observed that this optimism and positivity towards the rains is very short-lived by most people. It is not that people stop enjoying the rains after a point of time completely, it is the set of problems that it brings along which makes people want the rains to stop.

The proof of this reality is evident in the popular lines that all of us are familiar with: Rain, rain go away. Come again some other day.

Let me try and explain this. There are two categories of people largely: one category is those who love the rains and the other category is of those who hate the rains. Individuals in these categories are not mutually exclusive. In fact, all of us fall into one of the two categories at some point or the other depending Ron the situation and occasion that we are in.

Following are some of the situations when different people love the rains:
* When you are sitting at home, enjoying a nice cup of tea in the balcony along with pakoras.
* When a group of friends have gone on a long drive and the rain is just making the scenery around look beautiful.
* When heavy rains would lead to an off from school for a kid who hates going to school.
* When a guy is going on a bike ride with his girlfriend.
* When a couple are sitting by the sea and enjoying a hot corn cob between them.

Following are some of the situations when the same set of people despise the rains:
* When you are headed to office and a bit of rainfall is all it takes to bring the city to a standstill and your car to a start stop start stop routine and double the time from your normal time to reach office.
* When women are all dressed up in their finery for a wedding where they are supposed to walk in the Baraat and there are puddles all around.
* When you are living in a city like Mumbai and you are heading home and your means of transport - local trains are either filled to the brim or have stopped functioning due to the heavy rains and you have no way to reach home.
* When you are headed to the airport, already running late and with the rains, your chance of reaching the airport on time looks very unlikely.

Like I had mentioned, none of these are situations happening with different people but rather situations that all of us have faced at some point of time in our lives. So the next time that you are praying for rains, pray for the rains as well as the situation you want to be in so that you can enjoy the rains rather than curse and despise such a beautiful phenomenon.

While you guys read this, let me enjoy a hot cup of coffee while I enjoy  the rain from my balcony :) 

LETTING GO

The topic that I have chosen for today’s blog has some relevance in each and every one of our lives.  As human beings, emotions play a significant role in deciding our behaviour and in building relationships and attachments towards people as well as inanimate objects and things.

Quite often as someone or something becomes ours, we tend to get emotionally attached to it very strongly and the reasons for the same can be multifold. Some people or things bring joy and happiness to us, some others have a certain strong memory/memories attached to it, while some others have been acquired by putting in a lot of value (money or time or emotion or efforts).

From here on, I would like to talk about people and objects as two separate entities as each of the two has a separate emotion and value to it and it would be foolish to talk about the two in the same frame or with the same lens.

I will start with the inanimate objects first as they can be dealt with far easily than people. When I say that they can be dealt with far easily, what I mean is that one can let go off them far more easily. Yes, letting go…..two words which most of us hate to hear when it comes to things that we are very fond of. Letting go is a very strong action which requires one to be strong mentally and emotionally as letting go in most cases also means that you are accepting the fact that the thing will go away from you forever and you will not get to see it again in most cases. It is a very difficult act to perform and that is the reason we see a number of people holding on to a number of things dearly.

Let me illustrate what I am saying by a number of examples.

I have seen a number of mothers keeping the small clothes and toys of their kids, neatly folded/packed, occupying a large amount of space in their houses and cupboards even though the kid has become an adult and has left the home for a bright future. For that mother, there is no monetary value to any of these items but there is so much of nostalgia and memory attached to these items that asking her to let go off these can be very difficult.

Similarly, there are a number of women who still keep a size 26 jeans in their cupboard although they have outgrown that size a number of times over the last few years and they know it very well that they will never be able to reach that size again unless they decide to starve themselves. Yet if you were to ever ask them to let go of this jeans, the response that you will get is that she is keeping it so that she can wear it once again when she comes back to size 26.  Here again, when the woman looks at the jeans what she is actually remembering is that there were those days when she was really that slim. Nostalgia and memories once again play a big role in not allowing her to let go of her jeans.

You have a number of such cases of people keeping things that they won’t use again in future – books, clothes, toys, shoes and the list can go on.

It is always a struggle for them to let go of these possessions but sometimes you need to take that big step and just let it go as most of these things just occupy too much of space, which can be used to store or keep something else. Unless and until the emotion behind keeping that item is way too strong, you should just follow the rule of 6 and let go of these items.

Rule of 6 is an interesting rule that allows or facilitates letting go with some amount of ease. All you have to do is go through all the things that you have/own/possess every six months and ask yourself that which of these is something I have not used/worn/taken out in the last six months and put all those items aside. Once you have got them separated and if they are more than 6 items then what you can do is ask yourself that which of the 6 out of these is something I can let go off without feeling very bad. Select those 6 items and just discard them. You will feel better at this after sometime and you will also realise how much space you have got for new things and items in your life.

Now that the easy part has been talked about, let me talk about the difficult part which involves letting go of people.

Just look around and you will see a number of people who are holding on to another person even though there is no meaning left in holding on any more as there is no love or no happiness or no bond.  You see people holding on to companies (who I will consider as people) even though they are not happy there, people holding on to their partners even though the relationship or marriage has gone kaput, people holding on to friends who are really not friends but opportunists.

In most cases, people are holding on to other people and not letting go because of:

1. The time and effort that they have given – Seen mostly in case of companies, relationships and friendships
2. Kids and Social stigma – Seen mostly in case of marriages
3. Fear of the future and the unknown – Seen mostly in case of companies, relationships and marriages
4. Inertia or the mental strength – Seen mostly in case of companies and relationships

Almost all the people know when there is a genuine bond or feeling between people and when are they really holding on. There is just no point in dragging it for more time when you know that the result will be the same or worse. Of course, in the case of people, one has to try much harder and see if there is any merit and value in holding on or not before deciding the next step.

Yes, letting go in this case is not easy at all and it can really drain you out but sometimes when it has to be done it has to be done. Unfortunately there is no rule of 6 that can work in this case. The only rule that works here is asking your heart and your head whether it is worth continuing any more or will you be happy and better off outside and with that single approach, just go ahead and let go.

IPL – Its Web is wider than you think

Now that the Indian Premier League 4 has been done and dusted with, putting out a blog on IPL is as risky as facing Lasith Malinga without a helmet as you don’t know how the ball will respond. Well, this blog was supposed to be out during the IPL itself but due to laziness, inertia, and the IPL itself, was not able to put it together though the thought kept swimming in the mind all through. As you all know, you can’t hold back thoughts beyond a certain time and they have a tendency of wanting to come out once they get germinated, so here-on I present to you my thoughts on the IPL.

This blog is actually not about how great this IPL tournament was or how well some of the teams played or any of those other compliments and brickbats that have already been seen and read in print and online through various tweets and status updates. This blog is actually about stepping back a bit and noticing how the IPL is a big revenue generator (for BCCI, franchises and players – yes, we already know that) for people/industries that we tend to overlook as part of getting affected through the IPL.

Let me illustrate the people/industries impacted by the IPL through a web:

Let us talk about each one of them one by one so as to understand how they get impacted by IPL:

1. Airlines: The revenue of airlines who are the travel partners for the entire IPL tournament grows manifold as on a daily basis, some sectors (sectors between which travellers are travelling) have a confirmed 25 – 30 seats booked (business + economy) per team, which includes the players, the team management, the support staff. etc. Moreover, all these bookings are done well in advance so what that means is that the airlines is getting confirmed bookings across key sectors for a decent number of seats for a period of 48 days at one shot itself, which is a huge cash amount accumulating through a single booking (could possibly be the largest block booking).

2. Hotels: The hospitality partner for the tournament also sees a surge in their revenues similar to the airlines. Every day/alternate day, one team or the other is reaching the city and staying there in the hotel with each person allotted a single room (executive or superior and not deluxe). Once again, all of these bookings are done well in advance and at one shot, so this block deal boosts the revenue of the hotels involved, in a significant manner.

3. Printers: Local printers of a city who are involved in printing all the posters, banners, the 4s and 6s placards are able to do business equal to 3 – 4 months by being involved in the IPL hype, publicity and promotion.

4. Security Agencies: As we all know, IPL involves celebrities, parties, events, etc.. and all of this calls for additional security over and above the state security. All the big security agencies of the city in which the IPL matches are being held get involved in providing security to these people and events and thereby becoming one of the key beneficiaries of the tournament and its largesse.

5. Event Management Companies: Becoming the chosen partner to host and hold the IPL parties and events is an ambition that each and every event management company of the city has but only a select few are able to really get lucky and strike the deal. The scale of these parties are seen and known to all and any company involved in organising such events is making a killing and adding a few zeroes to its balance sheet.

6. Restaurants and Pubs: The joy of watching a cricket match gets multiplied when you are watching it with a group of friends on a large screen and there is food and drinks to keep the merriment going. The duration of the IPL tournament sees pubs and restaurants running special offers, putting up giant screens, making specific IPL dishes, special discounts for a group of 10 people and above and various other innovative ideas with the sole purpose of earning much, much more than what is being spent to pull the crowds in. This is a win-win for all as guests feel pampered and the restaurants get their cash registers ringing.

7. Liquor Companies/Cola Companies: Till a few years backs, liquor and cola companies used to look forward to the summer season as the sale of beer/colas would go up tremendously. Now, the summer party begins a month or two earlier as soon as the IPL Chairman declares “I declare the IPL tournament open” as what this also implies is a huge fillip to the sales of these companies through alcohol/colas bought at the restaurants/pubs as well as that bought for home consumption.

8. Local transport: Match days are days of extra income for drivers of local transport – autos and cabs. Not only do they tend to get a large number of people heading to the stadium using their means, they are also able to charge extra later in the night once the match is over, knowing very well that the exuberant mood and the desire to get home soon will make people loosen their pockets a bit and won’t mind paying a few tenners extra.

9. Food Vendors: With the kind of security checks and drills in place these days, everyone is apprehensive that if they do not reach the stadium on time, they will not be able to enter before the match starts and they will miss out on lot of action. As a result of this, people land up at the stadiums 4 – 5 hours before the match time, get into queues and slowly make their way to their seats. What this means is that they would get hungry and thirsty much before the match starts and even during the course of the match. This is the right opportunity for the local vendors to be present outside the stadium and inside (licensed vendors) with items like water bottles, cola cans, chips, biscuits, chocolates, etc. which people want and for which they do not mind paying a rupee or two extra. Regular food vendors always keep a track of match days and stock themselves accordingly as these are the opportunities to earn more than what they earn on a regular day.

I am sure when the IPL was envisaged by Lalit Modi, he would not have thought of how it will change the fortunes of a number of other people and other sectors over and above the fortunes of the players. 

The sectors and people listed by me in the web above may not be all comprehensive as I believe that there might be a number of other sectors and people who also make a killing during and through the IPL and either I have missed them while putting this blog or I am oblivious to their existence also in this web of the IPL.

Would be great to know if you, my reader knows of any other sector/people who gain a lot due to the IPL.

The Phone that never Rang

She sat in the balcony with the phone in her hand,

The sun being its cruellest, her arms looked tanned.

Since when had she been sitting here, she had no clue

She had reached a stage that nothing could affect her – heat, cold or flu.


It had been six months since he last came home,

She had no idea where he was – Mumbai, London or Rome.

It came all of a sudden like a bolt of lightning,

Not only was his decision alarming, it was also frightening.


After five years of being together, he wanted to move away.

All her pleading and all her requests did not seem to make him sway.

According to him, the love had gone and his feelings had faded,

But he did not realise that this one decision of his had made her jaded.


Yes they used to argue and they used to fight,

But there were also days that looked perfect, happy and bright.

The day he left her, she thought he would come back as this is just a phase,

After all, they had decided, that together a couple of kids they will raise.


But he never returned, he never came back,

And a few days after that she got her first migraine attack.

After three days of hospitalisation, she finally got released,

But he did not come to see her and she was not at all pleased.


Often these days, she asked herself “Why did this happen, what did I do?”

What puzzled her was that a few days before leaving he had told her “I love you”

She still remembered how he had said once before going to sleep “I can never think of a life without you”

And putting her head on his chest, she had replied “Me too”.


Now it had been six months and she had lost all hope,

It seemed to her as if her life was going down a slope.

Sitting in the balcony, she looked at her phone again, hoping for it to ring or beep,

But that never happened and all she could do was sit there and weep.

Stages of Life through your Seating Position in the Car

The other day while I was driving my car and was stuck in bad traffic, I kept thinking about the amount of time of our lives that we spend in the car and what struck me was that for every age of our life, we sit in different seating positions in the car and with different sets of people.

It is just that life passes by us so fast that we never see the significance of this or how the dots connect very nicely.

Let me make an attempt to put down how an ideal person’s (male) age and stages of life evolves depending on the seat that he is occupying in the car:

Ages 1- 4: You sit in the front seat on the mother’s lap with the father driving the car and you watch the world around with curiosity.

Ages 5 – 16: You have now moved to the back of the car while being driven and you ask lots of questions to your parents as this is the time of building your identity during the course of these years.

Ages 16 – 18: This is a stage of occupying the driver’s seat with the father on the passenger’s seat giving driving lessons to the son/daughter. This is a frustrating time as every mistake of yours while driving the car can get reprimanded by your father.

Ages 18 – 20: Now you have reached an age where you proudly drive the car with a gang of friends and great music blaring from the stereo. This is the feeling of ‘Cool’.

Ages 20 – 22: This is when you sit in the driver’s seat with the father in the passenger’s seat and mother in the back seat. This is when the responsibility of taking them everywhere comes to you and you love that as you get to drive the car on every occasion.

Ages 23 – 26: Driving the car with your girlfriend sitting next to you. This is the time where the enjoyment is not in the driving but in the fact that you have got a beautiful person sitting next to you. You feel as the luckiest and happiest person on this planet.

Ages 26 – 28: You buy your first car from your own money and it is the proudest moment for you at that point of time in life. You take your parents out in the new car and notice their pride. You take your girlfriend/fiancé out in your new car and love the beaming look on her face. This is the stage in life when you feel that life is perfect for you.

Ages 28 – 29: Driving the car with your wife next to you. This is a great period as you have got married recently and together as a couple you want to check out lot of new restaurants in town, watch all the good movies and make every weekend a great and enjoyable weekend.

Ages 29 - 30: Radio is your morning companion as your tread through traffic, all alone on a daily basis trying to reach to your place of work. This is the stage by when you have driven enough that you hate driving to office daily and you know that it is really not the drive that you hate but the pain of using clutch and brake after every two minutes in the crazy office hour traffic that really puts you off.

Ages 29 – 31: The car usually involves two couples: your best friend and his wife along with your wife and you. All of you feel that it is great fun to go out either for a weekend trip or for a nice dinner with a bunch of friends.

Ages 31 – 33: Once again you are behind the wheels with your wife seated next to you but this time she has got your kid on her lap on the front seat exactly the way you had once been in that seat during the ages of 1 – 4.

Ages 34 – 45: This is a stage when a person is doing really well in life especially with regards to his professional career. This is the time of moving back to the back seat and handing over the keys to a chauffeur who will ensure that you can utilise your time better while seated behind. In most cases, this time the car that you are sitting in is not the first car that you had bought.

From age 34 onwards, during the time that you are not heading to office, it is a repeat of all the ages mentioned above, but this time you are playing the role of a father and your kid is playing the role of you.

Thank You Team India

Dear Team India,


I would like to take this opportunity to thank you not only for myself but on behalf of the entire nation. With such a sensational World Cup victory, you have brought joy and pride to each and every Indian living in every part of the world. You gave all of us a moment that has allowed us to forget our worries, our sadness, our struggles, our mundane lives for some time and given us the opportunity to be a part of this celebration.

Your World Cup victory was celebrated in every house, every street, every corner, and every intersection of the country with great chutzpah, zeal and energy. I was out on the streets of Delhi after the victory and I saw people in big cars and small cars, people on bikes, people on foot, people in autos and people on trucks with each one having a glow on their face, a smile on their lips and just one word to say ‘Indiaaaa… Indiaaa’. When I saw a guy standing on his cycle without a shirt dancing and waving to every car passing by and people stopping by to hug him and dance him, I knew then and there that victory is sweet without any ifs and buts. It also told us once again that victory has no caste, no colour, no creed and no regional bias. The sight of young guys and girls on the bonnets of their cars, standing out of their windows, holding the flag of India was a sight of a lifetime. Even the cops did not want to spoil the party and they let people just be. There were some joyous and amusing moments also when I noticed two guys standing out of the windows of a car, wearing the T-shirts of ‘Dhoni’ and ‘Tendulkar’ mentioned on it and the guy on the front holding a big trophy in his hand. It could not have got more symbolic than this.

What also amused me was the same people who were abusing the style of playing of the Indian team during the qualifying stages and criticizing Dhoni’s captaincy, his strategic decisions and his form on Facebook and Twitter after every inning, every session and every match had suddenly done a volte face and were now tom-tomming the same team and captain calling him a great leader and a true strategist. I remember telling my mother how quickly people change their stance and colour surprises me and she summed it up beautifully by saying ‘Ugte hue suraj ko sab salaam karte hain’. I always knew India is an emotional side when it comes to cricket but not only are we extremely emotional, we are also extremely impatient as we expect results instantly and cannot control the urge of lambasting you guys even when the match is not over as yet.

To further add to the drama, there was the Indian media playing its role of Narad-Muni to perfection, building full hype around every player and every match, with complete background music, interspersing movie dialogues with scenes from earlier matches of India and getting everyone from an ex-cricketer to an astrologer to come and give their two bit of what will happen in the next match and who will be the key. Some of the people giving all the tips had never every played cricket or picked up a bat in their lives but that is India, where every person, be it an auto-driver, a fashion designer, a corporate guy or a normal middle-class businessman with a paunch has his own expert comments on what you guys should be doing and what you should not.

Team India – you showed us all how it is done in style despite 2.4 billion eyes watching you like the eagle watching its prey, ready to swoop down on it when there is one wrong move. Achieving the victory through a six was a statement to the world that we have arrived and arrived in style and now we will dominate like never before. Each and every one of you - Sachin, Yuvraj, Virat, Gambhir, Raina, Zaheer and of course Dhoni showed why India is such a formidable opponent.

There was a lot to learn from you guys in terms of team work, handling pressure, delegation of responsibility, managing and leading from the front, never-say-die attitude and I already know that over the next few years, every corporate AV, every new launch, every team-building workshop and every leadership seminar will have pictures and videos of the quarters, semis and the finals telling each and every one of us how it is done.

While it is good to use all these visuals to motivate working people like us, I also feel that there was lot more that the corporate world can learn from you guys. They can learn that one does not have to be made to work for years and years before being given the command of a team. It is not always about experience. Sometimes it is also about the ability, capability, killer instinct and passion that an individual possesses that should decide who should lead from the front. Corporates should also learn from you guys that it is perfectly fine for even a 15 year old senior to work under his junior without the senior feeling any insecurity about it or the junior feeling a sense of over-achievement about it.

Dhoni, by staying behind a few paces and letting Sachin get all the limelight post the victory, you also told us that credit should be given where it is due and a leader should know when to step back and yet enjoy the success of his team. By shaving your head off immediately after the victory, you also taught us that staying true to your word is far important than looking good from the outside.

I can go on and on about what all was there for us to learn but I would leave that part to the HR people and motivational speakers at this point of time as this blog is really not about picking what I learnt but rather about what I saw during the entire duration of the tournament all around me.

One of the things that struck me during the course of the World Cup was that surprisingly China has not picked up this sport as yet. Could it be because cricket is still not included in the Olympics and so it does not hold the same charm to them? I am not ready to believe that China is not capable to play cricket as today they are playing each and every sport, including Volleyball and Basketball, which earlier was not the key sports of China. I would not be surprised if over the next few years, seeing what you guys have been able to achieve, they pick up this sport and we see them participating in the World Cup of 2019. I would surely be keen to see a battle between India and China on the cricket field. It would also allow us to avenge for the Indo-China War. Well I guess there is no point of talking about this as right now China is not a cricket playing nation so there is no point in discussing that further.

From a corporate stand point, being a marketer, I can vouch for the fact that this victory of yours has got a large number of people of my fraternity extremely excited and they have already started discussing new campaigns and new brands having one or lot of you in that. As I had said earlier ‘Ugte hue suraj ko sab salaam karte hain’. You guys deserve it as well and you should it enjoy it to the hilt. After all, a wait of 28 years has been brought to an end. You have brought rains to the land suffering from the drought of the World Cup victory and so once again, I would like to thank each and every one of you with utmost gratitude and with great pride.

Cheers Team India!